2013 Bucket List
Bucket list – since Resolutions are far too old and vague and I never accomplish them anyway.
- Hear mass every Sunday.
- Finish at least five legit crossword puzzles.
- Make it to President’s or Dean’s List.
- Acquire “Colton Dixon: The Messenger” album.
- Religiously see every living The Vampire Diaries episodes.
- See Warm Bodies with Zandro Geral and Kath Valle (February).
- See The Host (March).
- Acquire more books, shoes and clothes.
- Land a decent summer job.
- Make butterbeers with Zandro.
- Work more, procrastinate less.
- See Monsters University (June).
- See Despicable Me II with Khaye Villar (July).
- Have another legit published article.
- Be an effective and productive leader.
- See City of Bones with Zandro and Kath (August).
- Apply for Candy Council of Cool 2013.
- See Percy Jackson and the Olympians: Sea of Monsters (August).
- Read at least twenty novels within the year.
- Attend Candy Fair 2013 with Diana Agulto.
- Meet Great Crush or else go nuts with misery.
- Acquire a new digital camera or DSLR.
- Make a mood board (corkboard) for my room.
- See The Hunger Games: Catching Fire with Zandro and Kath (November).
- Flourish in my internship.
- Stay happily single.
- Meet Sam Concepcion (just because) and/or Colton Dixon (a.k.a. Don’t Be Stupid, Faye).
- Write more chapters for my hundred-years-in-making Teenage Dreams.
- Produce tolerably creative videos.
- Be an active member of any Goodreads group/s.
- Practice a healthy lifestyle and try not to die.
- Break the It’s An Odd-numbered Year, Congratulations, You’re Unlucky outlook.
2012: In A Nutshell
2012 is coming to an end, and instead of doing a nutshell for December, I’ll make one for the whole year. I do this every year, though, but this year will be different. For the last few years I enumerated good things that had happened to me, using the numbering system with my barely incomprehensible and totally uncreative side remarks (e.g. “It was awesome!” or “OMG, I can’t believe it happened!”). I’ve ventured into writing
creatively as much as possible, and although my posts still wouldn’t pass in the Most Creative Blog Post Ever category, I can say that at least my writing is improving compared to the shits I did a few years back. Anyway, instead of using the numbering system (as what I’ve been trying to tell you about), I will just pick a few Amazing Moments of 2012 and try to elaborate about them – the cause and effect, the glory it made me feel, and what’s next for them. (I might also include the shitty ones, though.)
Legally Blonde: The Musical. So in my new college they have this annual Literary Musical contest, and according to history and school records, the Institute of Liberal Arts has been winning the title for the past years. Yes, we suck at sports, but give us a performing stage and will be MVP. I got to play Paulette’s part in the musical – I haven’t seen the movie or the play but I liked her personality from the moment I read “Honey, you’re in the supply closet!” We worked hard and rehearsed harder for the contest… which never happened. First it was
postponed, next it was
cancelled. It was a bit disappointing, yes, but when I think about it, we really lacked preparation and needed more time. And hello, it’s a 25-minute performance and we barely perfected the first half. It was bittersweet, but the moments we shared during rehearsals were only sweet,
not bitter. (And thanks to
Legally Blonde, people realized wasn’t the nerdy, dour person they thought I was. Apparently, I’m overflowing with crazy candies. Meh.)
The downfall of 2.0. I know it may seem conceited, but this was the first time I got a grade of 2.0 in my college history (and I got two of it!). It’s only been my second year, but I don’t know, I guess seeing the curvy number made my heart ache; I’d rather stick with the shining vertical, thank you.
Live 5. I’m not such a fan of concerts and pressing, sweaty bodies, but I had to endure all these to see five bands in one concert. What the fuck,
anything for my fangirl needs. I saw Forever the Sickest Kids, A+ Dropouts, A Rocket to the Moon, The Ready Set (in which Jordan is hot) and The Summer Set (which makes me cry just thinking about them), with an awkwardly-composed party I never thought I’d see a concert with. (TSS, come back! With freakin’ Parachute!)
Summer. It was lame. I didn’t go swimming or tanning or frying myself; I became a lifeless, Internet-bound movie buff I never imagined I’d be until it happened. I basically spent my free days hunting for free movie hosting sites and waiting for Michael Cera’s,
Narnia and
Halloweentown movies to buffer. I didn’t read all throughout the summer, but it was worth it. It gave me headaches, but it was worth it. Whatever.
My journey to fame. Not true, but almost there. It happened on my birthday: just when I turned 19, I was immortalized in a broadsheet which will never be reproduced, but still, as long as I keep my copy, I’m immortal as a goddess can be. My article got published and I was so excited and I didn’t tell Mom right away and my Facebook Timeline was swarming with both congratulatory and birthday messages and my father was acting weird and it was a bit
embarrassing and I’ve never been so vain. After a few months, my school knew about it and they had a copy scanned and printed in the library and thank God they didn’t post it or else I’d burn it down. (I’m a good person.)
Worst day ever. A day without
Colton Dixon is my standard for a worst day. I thought I’d get to see him, but apparently I’m
stupid as fuck. It was frustrating; my brother found it amusing; my friends thought I was trying to be funny. Anyway, Colton is coming back for a
Valentine concert with
Jessica Sanchez, and I’m not sure if I’d see it but I hope I will and WE’LL GET MARRIED ALBEIT HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. (P.S.: Congratulations in advance, Colton, for the release of your album! Take that, non-believers.)
Yearning for my boys. The list of my boys is getting longer and longer, and I’m becoming lonelier and lonelier. I miss
Sam Concepcion (it’s been fifteen centuries since the last time I saw him); I
literally missed Colton;
Paul Wesley is a continent and a million kilometers away;
Cole Sprouse is acting weird lately; Robert Pattinson is probably making love with Kristen Stewart right now; my perfect men are all living inside books; and my Great Crush is giving me depressing feels (not to mention an epic fail moment last April). (Bull.)
Movies and friends. I saw four movies with my friends this year:
The Hunger Games,
The Perks of Being a Wallflower and
Breaking Dawn II (with
Zandro,
Kath and
EJ);
I Do Bidoo Bidoo (with Meanne and
Khaye). The shits me and the former company had been through this year were full-on super shitty, but as always, we forgot about it. It will forever haunt us, but we like horror movies, we can tolerate haunts.
President’s List. I made it to President’s List with my 1.13 GPA for the first semester! It’s not official yet since we haven’t done the awarding ceremony, but I’m already enjoying my scholarship (even though my hormone isn’t) and everyone thinks I’m smart (and I’m snorting nonstop) and I don’t want them to think that way (not because of the pressure, but because I always do the hard things in a group work – fuck).
Books, books and did I mention books? I reached my 100 reads! I became friends and enemies with people and aliens and immortals we don’t usually meet in grocery stores; I had crashed in to different homes and cities and universe without rent pay; my bookworm alter ego had been born and baptized:
Loony Dragonslayer (because I have fervor for Luna Lovegood and Nephilim family names); and my social life is officially non-existent. So far I now have 104, and I’m so elated, and I promised to God that I’d study like a genius already after I accomplish this but hitherto I haven’t been acting all Einstein. I’m sorry, but I cannot
not read. I need it like how much I need oxygen and
The Vampire Diaries.
ILA Week. Read more
here.
I’m really scared of 2013 since it’s an odd number (experience told me to be friends with even-numbered years), but what the hell. At least it’s 2013 and the world didn’t end in contrast with how the Mayan Calendar and “Gangnam Style” pointed out.
Parting words from
Isaac Marion: “It’s a shitty world and shit happens, but we don’t have to bathe in shit.” Besides, shit doesn’t make a good perfume.
The Checklist
2012 Resolutions slash To-Do List
- Hear mass every week.
- Watch The Hunger Games movie. In 3D. With Zandro and Kathleen.
- Religiously watch every living The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle episode.
- Take make-up summer classes.
- Look for a freakishly fun summer job.
- Read and watch the news every day.
- Finish “Teenage Dreams” for heaven’s sake.
- Will I still buy Pop Class? And/or Forever Young? Geez.
- Take care of Fourthy (my eyeglasses).
- Put up a new blog (without leaving the old ones behind).
- Take care of my babies, Wingardium, Wonda and Willow.
- Save up for some new jeans, sneakers and endless books.
- Meet the Skittles Babies (Cezkieth Linson, Trisha Caranto and Marie Castillo), Patricia Sayurin, and my girlfriend, Sai Edris.
- Think more. Swear less.
- UNOS! (I got some, but not all.)
- Don’t be afraid to grow old.
- Go and see Sam Concepcion’s concert.
- Attend the Candy Fair 2012. With Diane, maybe.
- Stay happily single.
- Read the City of Ember series, Mockingjay, The Hobbit and etc.
- Watch The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
- Watch Breaking Dawn part 2. With Zandro and Kathleen.
- Spend the holidays in Bicol.
- Meet my grade school friends.
- Take a 15-30-minute walk every day.
- Try my best to avoid zits and unwanted entities on my body.
- Practice a healthy lifestyle.
- Make 2012 my freakin’ awesome year.
- Live a God-oriented, God-fearing and wonderful life.
Photo Blog: ILA Week
The Institute of Liberal Arts had its first ILA Week last November 26-29, 2012, with the theme, “ILA: Elevated”. The theme signifies how much ILA had improved both as an academic institution and as a society. It shows how the students had
elevated in the past few months.
The highlight of this four-day event was the “ILA: Elevated, the Concert”. It showcased the talents the students have. The concert was in a form of friendly competition among the different year levels. (The fourth year students won.)
Pigs flew… and I
sang. I remember the last time I sang in front of real people was during our Buwan ng Wika celebration in Treston International College two years ago (and as usual, I was an epic failure). And the next was this. I sang AJ Rafael’s “Without You” with Khaye Villar. It felt weird. My knees were shaking and so were my lips. I would’ve wanted to sing with my eyes closed for some dramatic effect but I didn’t (the only closed eyes I did was my blinking) because it looked cheesy, and
hello, we were just a special number squeezed in between real contestants, so I guessed there was no need for overly majestic singing skills (which I don’t have). Anyway, Khaye was amazing and I was…
wonk-wonk.
ILA Awesomes: (from left to right) Shenna Geronimo, Khaye, Myself, Mary Ann Bruan, Kristian Micah Reyes and Marijo Manansala.
As you can see, I can rock a denim vest, a suave mustache and a not-sure-if-this-was-a-cow-or-not headgear. And I’m
hot – Khaye said so, assuming that the arrow was pointed at me. (The ILA Week also had a photo booth.)
Hello, Institute of Liberal Arts! (And nope, that wasn’t everyone in our Society. We apparently have a knack for absenteeism.) Hello, Mr. Someone’s head! (All photos are from
©.)
Awkward Turtle
Dear FCC,
Hey.
I miss you.
And it’s weird, and awkward, and impossible, and unacceptable. I really
shouldn’t miss you because 1) there aren’t many memories to miss; 2) we’re not such close friends that I feel like 3) we’re just acquaintances; 4) we didn’t even exchange legit and sensible words; and 5) when I met you the last time, it was an epic
shame on my part.
I shouldn’t miss you, really. I should miss my block mates and Diane and Scarlet and anybody from our Students Circle – anyone but you. I should miss them and
not you. But that isn’t exactly the case. Yes, I miss them, but I also miss you. And if someone is to ask me why and how I found myself in this wretched yearning for a person I barely know, I’d probably just shrug my shoulders and not say anything than answer and stutter in the process.
If you’re reading this and have the gut feeling that you’re the addressee of this post, you may wonder why it’s you, why I miss you, why – instead of the other guys – I’m crazy about you. Consider this my declaration of admiration for you:
So I saw you on the first day of school – Orientation Day. I didn’t know who you were, really (and how could I?), but everyone did. I guess you were famous. I learned your name from I-don’t-remember-who, or maybe I learned it myself through senses. Then I remembered I already had an encounter with you online, in a Facebook page made just for the incoming students. How weird was that! I concluded that you were famous because you were one of the administrators of that page and heck, you were friendlier than a fast food mascot.
I stared at you. I kept staring at you. It was creepy, to be honest. I crept myself out. You were good looking and that smile of yours was just so charming. So on that first day of my college education I made my first crush. I didn’t have friends yet, but I already had my first crush. (Hence your nickname:
FCC, meaning
First College Crush.) There are just some things in life that are easier to do.
My admiration for you just grew and grew as the weeks passed, as I made new friends and ended up with just two close ones, as I wound my way through exams and dreariness and the cold and colds and fruitless fitting in and zits and restlessness and victories and a blog award and 1.0 and 1.75. The weather continued changing like a bitchy, bipolar person; the loads became heavier and heavier; my taste in music escalated from Usher to A Fine Frenzy; and all around us, people moved on. In all of these inconsistencies, the only constant factor (except for change, blah, blah) was
you – and pathetic exams, of course.
I started telling myself that I should
stop ogling over you and flushing hot-red when you were around because, just like exams, it was pathetic. Impossible love. Impossible attention. Impossible you.
Impossible us. Plain, dead, sick, agonizing impossibility.
I tried erasing you. Believe me, I tried. I did all I can to not like you anymore: I looked for someone else (non-celebrity) to like, exaggerated your flaws, and formed you into this annoying, lame, geeky socialite I disliked. It’s mean and disrespectful, but I only did it to save myself from this chasm of infatuation that gets deeper and deeper each day.
But what happens when we fight off a chasm? It just gets deeper and pulls us down farther. So I stopped. I stopped fighting this feeling. I stopped tarnishing you with your petty flaws and petty imperfections. I just stopped running away, ignoring and evading the exuding unmistakable charisma from you. It was futile anyway. It just hurt and was tiring, and I definitely looked stupid doing it.
I accepted the feeling again. Receive, receive, receive. I received the feelings gratefully like how a Shadowhunter receive a rune: it hurts at first, but in the end it’s
glorious.
So you can guess by now I still like you. I miss you. It’s almost three years and you’re still my Great Crush. I know that the
hopelessness of us is what makes it great, but what the hell, if it’s hopeless, then it’s hopeless. Let it be.
I don’t know if I’m in love with you already – I believe that isn’t the case yet. I’m not ready for love, especially since I haven’t seen you for months. If this is love already, then that’s scary.
I’m not asking anything from you. If ever you learn that I’m apparently crazy over you, I don’t wish for you to feel weird. I don’t want awkward turtles between us – or walls or impenetrable balloons or heavy clouds or hungry bulls or any other metaphor there is. If you don’t like me, that’s okay. If you like me back, then what the hell. Honestly, I
can’t imagine us together, reading books, casting spells like we’re in Hogwarts, worshipping a silver parachute like we’re tributes in the Hunger Games, admiring Lord Voldemort and Bellatrix Lestrange like they’re our heroes. I can’t picture us together. Maybe I don’t want us together. I just want to be friends with you.
And after that… it’ll lead us to where it should lead us, if there will be an
us. (I’m such a hypocrite, no?)
I just want you to know:
Hey.
I like you.
I miss you.
FCC.
I miss you.
G.
Hullabaloo.
Butterbeer?
Always,
Tintin
Movie Review: Breaking Dawn
I have this love-hate relationship with
The Twilight Saga. I’m not sure if I’m really
in love with it – I’ve long since realized that the books aren’t really majestic as what I thought they were when I first read them (there are more awesome books out there), but I’ve kept up with all of five movies, seen them in the cinemas with my best friend every year. So I’m dubious if I’m a Twihard or not. But anyway, I might as well write what I think about it like what I had done with the past movies. (I’m writing this while I’m sick, so pardon my filthy grammar and redundancy.)
Rants and Raves: Breaking Dawn I and II (with spoilers)
The casts. I had seen
Twilight without knowing who the casts were – no background idea about them whatsoever. Nobody looked familiar except for Kristen Stewart (the
Panic Room daughter). So you can say I didn’t really have the sufficient knowledge and rights to judge their acting skills and how they got it right/wrong with the roles. But as the movies went by, and I looked up every casts’ names and other projects, I realized that, yes, they got them
right. There were some doubts and criticisms about Stewart and Robert Pattinson’s castings, but they proved them wrong in the end. (You all know how much I love the Robsten tandem.) They grew into their characters and portrayed them well without losing their personalities outside the
Twilight world. They became comfortable and acted lightly like reading minds and producing force fields are the things they do under normal circumstances.
Kristen Stewart. (Yes, I have to allot a separate paragraph for her. That’s my way.) Truth be told, I wasn’t really such a fan of KStew in the early years of the saga. She’s beautiful, yes, but she wasn’t that
stunning in my eyes. I guess my fascination and stalking love for her started when I saw her in
The Runaways as the rock legend Joan Jett. She was fantastic in that movie and proved that she has different emotions, not just a plain, deadpan that bashers think she has. And then she plucked her eyebrows and curled her hair and wore beautiful clothes that showed her curves. I’ve loved her since, and it definitely added to my level of avidness for the movies. When she found herself in a controversy, I wasn’t even bothered for long. I didn’t care. That’s KStew, and that’s what she does, and who cares? It’s not her responsibility to keep you all glued and true to your humanity; she has her own, you have yours. And
okay, back to the saga. Umm, can I just say that she’s really my Bella Swan? I can’t imagine anyone else for that part. (Bias alert! Bias alert!)
The wedding. I don’t remember a lot about the Bella-Edward wedding scene from the book (Bella’s insecurities over Rosalie’s beauty – this I remember, though), but with the first
Breaking Dawn movie, I didn’t need to recall. I loved it: Bella’s dress, the rings, the venue, the colors, the song (“Flightless Bird, American Mouth”) and Charlie Swan, of course. And the love scene with the breaking headboard was
phenomenal.
The wolves. Were amazingly and artistically done. Thank you.
The non-Cullen vampires. I loved how they had shown that not every vampire is pale, chalk white. The diverse races of them bloodsuckers – showing different skin color, body type, language, super powers – were amazing. My favorite non-Cullen vampire would be that drunkard with all the hair and who somehow had a fling with one of the Denali vampire. (Remind me to look him up.) And of course the Volturri will always be
bad ass in my eyes.
Renesmee Carlie Cullen. I just have one question though: why were the younger and teenage Nessie faces computerized? Does she really have to look like her mother and they couldn’t find a fitting one so they resorted to the powers of technology? She’s cute, yes, but while I was watching her I couldn’t push away the thought that she was computerized. (How can someone forget that, though?)
Hot, vampire sex. (I borrowed that phrase from
The Vampire Diaries.) Not trying to be a pervert or anything, but I just really think vampire-Bella and Edward’s love scene in their cabin was
beautiful. It wasn’t the kind of scene that’s pornographic and somehow vomit-inducing and won’t give you spontaneous orgasm; it was just plain beautiful and passionate to watch. And it definitely beats the headboard-breaking, pillow-ripping, bruise-producing escapade. (Remember: Vampire beds aren’t meant for sleeping.)
The songs. After that super melancholic soundtrack from
New Moon (the only song that made it to my playlist was “Possibility”), I never bothered with appreciating the music they put in the movies. But the last installment’s got me all hooked again. The music was amazing and not monotone and “A Thousand Years [Part 2]” crawls into your heart and repeatedly stab it with its words that you just have to cry like shit. I also like “All I’ve Ever Needed” by Paul McDonald and Nikki Reed – they’re adorable. (I made a
BD II OST playlist. Enjoy.)
The last movie, concisely.(Meaning
Breaking Dawn II.) It was
fucked up – in a good way. For starters, it was funny. (I didn’t know vampire Bella was goofy.) I also like all the super imposed elements in the movie, emphasizing Bella’s newly-acquired skill for sharper senses – the drop of water, the blooming of flowers, the humming of birds, the scent of preys – brilliantly crafted. Fast forward to the battle scene, which I should say was very much a life-ruiner and a mind-fucker, thank you. Blame Alice Cullen’s premonition for my unnecessary heart breaking ann cries of shock and pain – the Cullens, the Clearwaters, the Volturri and several unnamed vampires dying was too much to bear. So that was the part I hated the most, together with the pixelated Nessie faces. The battle was technically brilliantly made, butt no more faux dying please?
To close this, even if
The Twilight Saga isn’t my favorite series of all time, it’s still part of me and my best friend’s movie history. It’s not the best there is, but it’s part of the olden times, and thank God for DVDs and soft copies, we can always re-watch it when we feel like we need some dose of nostalgia.
We’ll miss you,
Twilight. (Or more likely, we’ll miss you beautiful vampires, hot-bod wolves and Charlie Swan.)
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a woeful & chaotic diary since 071409
2013 Bucket List
Bucket list – since Resolutions are far too old and vague and I never accomplish them anyway.
- Hear mass every Sunday.
- Finish at least five legit crossword puzzles.
- Make it to President’s or Dean’s List.
- Acquire “Colton Dixon: The Messenger” album.
- Religiously see every living The Vampire Diaries episodes.
- See Warm Bodies with Zandro Geral and Kath Valle (February).
- See The Host (March).
- Acquire more books, shoes and clothes.
- Land a decent summer job.
- Make butterbeers with Zandro.
- Work more, procrastinate less.
- See Monsters University (June).
- See Despicable Me II with Khaye Villar (July).
- Have another legit published article.
- Be an effective and productive leader.
- See City of Bones with Zandro and Kath (August).
- Apply for Candy Council of Cool 2013.
- See Percy Jackson and the Olympians: Sea of Monsters (August).
- Read at least twenty novels within the year.
- Attend Candy Fair 2013 with Diana Agulto.
- Meet Great Crush or else go nuts with misery.
- Acquire a new digital camera or DSLR.
- Make a mood board (corkboard) for my room.
- See The Hunger Games: Catching Fire with Zandro and Kath (November).
- Flourish in my internship.
- Stay happily single.
- Meet Sam Concepcion (just because) and/or Colton Dixon (a.k.a. Don’t Be Stupid, Faye).
- Write more chapters for my hundred-years-in-making Teenage Dreams.
- Produce tolerably creative videos.
- Be an active member of any Goodreads group/s.
- Practice a healthy lifestyle and try not to die.
- Break the It’s An Odd-numbered Year, Congratulations, You’re Unlucky outlook.
2012: In A Nutshell
2012 is coming to an end, and instead of doing a nutshell for December, I’ll make one for the whole year. I do this every year, though, but this year will be different. For the last few years I enumerated good things that had happened to me, using the numbering system with my barely incomprehensible and totally uncreative side remarks (e.g. “It was awesome!” or “OMG, I can’t believe it happened!”). I’ve ventured into writing
creatively as much as possible, and although my posts still wouldn’t pass in the Most Creative Blog Post Ever category, I can say that at least my writing is improving compared to the shits I did a few years back. Anyway, instead of using the numbering system (as what I’ve been trying to tell you about), I will just pick a few Amazing Moments of 2012 and try to elaborate about them – the cause and effect, the glory it made me feel, and what’s next for them. (I might also include the shitty ones, though.)
Legally Blonde: The Musical. So in my new college they have this annual Literary Musical contest, and according to history and school records, the Institute of Liberal Arts has been winning the title for the past years. Yes, we suck at sports, but give us a performing stage and will be MVP. I got to play Paulette’s part in the musical – I haven’t seen the movie or the play but I liked her personality from the moment I read “Honey, you’re in the supply closet!” We worked hard and rehearsed harder for the contest… which never happened. First it was
postponed, next it was
cancelled. It was a bit disappointing, yes, but when I think about it, we really lacked preparation and needed more time. And hello, it’s a 25-minute performance and we barely perfected the first half. It was bittersweet, but the moments we shared during rehearsals were only sweet,
not bitter. (And thanks to
Legally Blonde, people realized wasn’t the nerdy, dour person they thought I was. Apparently, I’m overflowing with crazy candies. Meh.)
The downfall of 2.0. I know it may seem conceited, but this was the first time I got a grade of 2.0 in my college history (and I got two of it!). It’s only been my second year, but I don’t know, I guess seeing the curvy number made my heart ache; I’d rather stick with the shining vertical, thank you.
Live 5. I’m not such a fan of concerts and pressing, sweaty bodies, but I had to endure all these to see five bands in one concert. What the fuck,
anything for my fangirl needs. I saw Forever the Sickest Kids, A+ Dropouts, A Rocket to the Moon, The Ready Set (in which Jordan is hot) and The Summer Set (which makes me cry just thinking about them), with an awkwardly-composed party I never thought I’d see a concert with. (TSS, come back! With freakin’ Parachute!)
Summer. It was lame. I didn’t go swimming or tanning or frying myself; I became a lifeless, Internet-bound movie buff I never imagined I’d be until it happened. I basically spent my free days hunting for free movie hosting sites and waiting for Michael Cera’s,
Narnia and
Halloweentown movies to buffer. I didn’t read all throughout the summer, but it was worth it. It gave me headaches, but it was worth it. Whatever.
My journey to fame. Not true, but almost there. It happened on my birthday: just when I turned 19, I was immortalized in a broadsheet which will never be reproduced, but still, as long as I keep my copy, I’m immortal as a goddess can be. My article got published and I was so excited and I didn’t tell Mom right away and my Facebook Timeline was swarming with both congratulatory and birthday messages and my father was acting weird and it was a bit
embarrassing and I’ve never been so vain. After a few months, my school knew about it and they had a copy scanned and printed in the library and thank God they didn’t post it or else I’d burn it down. (I’m a good person.)
Worst day ever. A day without
Colton Dixon is my standard for a worst day. I thought I’d get to see him, but apparently I’m
stupid as fuck. It was frustrating; my brother found it amusing; my friends thought I was trying to be funny. Anyway, Colton is coming back for a
Valentine concert with
Jessica Sanchez, and I’m not sure if I’d see it but I hope I will and WE’LL GET MARRIED ALBEIT HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. (P.S.: Congratulations in advance, Colton, for the release of your album! Take that, non-believers.)
Yearning for my boys. The list of my boys is getting longer and longer, and I’m becoming lonelier and lonelier. I miss
Sam Concepcion (it’s been fifteen centuries since the last time I saw him); I
literally missed Colton;
Paul Wesley is a continent and a million kilometers away;
Cole Sprouse is acting weird lately; Robert Pattinson is probably making love with Kristen Stewart right now; my perfect men are all living inside books; and my Great Crush is giving me depressing feels (not to mention an epic fail moment last April). (Bull.)
Movies and friends. I saw four movies with my friends this year:
The Hunger Games,
The Perks of Being a Wallflower and
Breaking Dawn II (with
Zandro,
Kath and
EJ);
I Do Bidoo Bidoo (with Meanne and
Khaye). The shits me and the former company had been through this year were full-on super shitty, but as always, we forgot about it. It will forever haunt us, but we like horror movies, we can tolerate haunts.
President’s List. I made it to President’s List with my 1.13 GPA for the first semester! It’s not official yet since we haven’t done the awarding ceremony, but I’m already enjoying my scholarship (even though my hormone isn’t) and everyone thinks I’m smart (and I’m snorting nonstop) and I don’t want them to think that way (not because of the pressure, but because I always do the hard things in a group work – fuck).
Books, books and did I mention books? I reached my 100 reads! I became friends and enemies with people and aliens and immortals we don’t usually meet in grocery stores; I had crashed in to different homes and cities and universe without rent pay; my bookworm alter ego had been born and baptized:
Loony Dragonslayer (because I have fervor for Luna Lovegood and Nephilim family names); and my social life is officially non-existent. So far I now have 104, and I’m so elated, and I promised to God that I’d study like a genius already after I accomplish this but hitherto I haven’t been acting all Einstein. I’m sorry, but I cannot
not read. I need it like how much I need oxygen and
The Vampire Diaries.
ILA Week. Read more
here.
I’m really scared of 2013 since it’s an odd number (experience told me to be friends with even-numbered years), but what the hell. At least it’s 2013 and the world didn’t end in contrast with how the Mayan Calendar and “Gangnam Style” pointed out.
Parting words from
Isaac Marion: “It’s a shitty world and shit happens, but we don’t have to bathe in shit.” Besides, shit doesn’t make a good perfume.
The Checklist
2012 Resolutions slash To-Do List
- Hear mass every week.
- Watch The Hunger Games movie. In 3D. With Zandro and Kathleen.
- Religiously watch every living The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle episode.
- Take make-up summer classes.
- Look for a freakishly fun summer job.
- Read and watch the news every day.
- Finish “Teenage Dreams” for heaven’s sake.
- Will I still buy Pop Class? And/or Forever Young? Geez.
- Take care of Fourthy (my eyeglasses).
- Put up a new blog (without leaving the old ones behind).
- Take care of my babies, Wingardium, Wonda and Willow.
- Save up for some new jeans, sneakers and endless books.
- Meet the Skittles Babies (Cezkieth Linson, Trisha Caranto and Marie Castillo), Patricia Sayurin, and my girlfriend, Sai Edris.
- Think more. Swear less.
- UNOS! (I got some, but not all.)
- Don’t be afraid to grow old.
- Go and see Sam Concepcion’s concert.
- Attend the Candy Fair 2012. With Diane, maybe.
- Stay happily single.
- Read the City of Ember series, Mockingjay, The Hobbit and etc.
- Watch The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
- Watch Breaking Dawn part 2. With Zandro and Kathleen.
- Spend the holidays in Bicol.
- Meet my grade school friends.
- Take a 15-30-minute walk every day.
- Try my best to avoid zits and unwanted entities on my body.
- Practice a healthy lifestyle.
- Make 2012 my freakin’ awesome year.
- Live a God-oriented, God-fearing and wonderful life.
Photo Blog: ILA Week
The Institute of Liberal Arts had its first ILA Week last November 26-29, 2012, with the theme, “ILA: Elevated”. The theme signifies how much ILA had improved both as an academic institution and as a society. It shows how the students had
elevated in the past few months.
The highlight of this four-day event was the “ILA: Elevated, the Concert”. It showcased the talents the students have. The concert was in a form of friendly competition among the different year levels. (The fourth year students won.)
Pigs flew… and I
sang. I remember the last time I sang in front of real people was during our Buwan ng Wika celebration in Treston International College two years ago (and as usual, I was an epic failure). And the next was this. I sang AJ Rafael’s “Without You” with Khaye Villar. It felt weird. My knees were shaking and so were my lips. I would’ve wanted to sing with my eyes closed for some dramatic effect but I didn’t (the only closed eyes I did was my blinking) because it looked cheesy, and
hello, we were just a special number squeezed in between real contestants, so I guessed there was no need for overly majestic singing skills (which I don’t have). Anyway, Khaye was amazing and I was…
wonk-wonk.
ILA Awesomes: (from left to right) Shenna Geronimo, Khaye, Myself, Mary Ann Bruan, Kristian Micah Reyes and Marijo Manansala.
As you can see, I can rock a denim vest, a suave mustache and a not-sure-if-this-was-a-cow-or-not headgear. And I’m
hot – Khaye said so, assuming that the arrow was pointed at me. (The ILA Week also had a photo booth.)
Hello, Institute of Liberal Arts! (And nope, that wasn’t everyone in our Society. We apparently have a knack for absenteeism.) Hello, Mr. Someone’s head! (All photos are from
©.)
Awkward Turtle
Dear FCC,
Hey.
I miss you.
And it’s weird, and awkward, and impossible, and unacceptable. I really
shouldn’t miss you because 1) there aren’t many memories to miss; 2) we’re not such close friends that I feel like 3) we’re just acquaintances; 4) we didn’t even exchange legit and sensible words; and 5) when I met you the last time, it was an epic
shame on my part.
I shouldn’t miss you, really. I should miss my block mates and Diane and Scarlet and anybody from our Students Circle – anyone but you. I should miss them and
not you. But that isn’t exactly the case. Yes, I miss them, but I also miss you. And if someone is to ask me why and how I found myself in this wretched yearning for a person I barely know, I’d probably just shrug my shoulders and not say anything than answer and stutter in the process.
If you’re reading this and have the gut feeling that you’re the addressee of this post, you may wonder why it’s you, why I miss you, why – instead of the other guys – I’m crazy about you. Consider this my declaration of admiration for you:
So I saw you on the first day of school – Orientation Day. I didn’t know who you were, really (and how could I?), but everyone did. I guess you were famous. I learned your name from I-don’t-remember-who, or maybe I learned it myself through senses. Then I remembered I already had an encounter with you online, in a Facebook page made just for the incoming students. How weird was that! I concluded that you were famous because you were one of the administrators of that page and heck, you were friendlier than a fast food mascot.
I stared at you. I kept staring at you. It was creepy, to be honest. I crept myself out. You were good looking and that smile of yours was just so charming. So on that first day of my college education I made my first crush. I didn’t have friends yet, but I already had my first crush. (Hence your nickname:
FCC, meaning
First College Crush.) There are just some things in life that are easier to do.
My admiration for you just grew and grew as the weeks passed, as I made new friends and ended up with just two close ones, as I wound my way through exams and dreariness and the cold and colds and fruitless fitting in and zits and restlessness and victories and a blog award and 1.0 and 1.75. The weather continued changing like a bitchy, bipolar person; the loads became heavier and heavier; my taste in music escalated from Usher to A Fine Frenzy; and all around us, people moved on. In all of these inconsistencies, the only constant factor (except for change, blah, blah) was
you – and pathetic exams, of course.
I started telling myself that I should
stop ogling over you and flushing hot-red when you were around because, just like exams, it was pathetic. Impossible love. Impossible attention. Impossible you.
Impossible us. Plain, dead, sick, agonizing impossibility.
I tried erasing you. Believe me, I tried. I did all I can to not like you anymore: I looked for someone else (non-celebrity) to like, exaggerated your flaws, and formed you into this annoying, lame, geeky socialite I disliked. It’s mean and disrespectful, but I only did it to save myself from this chasm of infatuation that gets deeper and deeper each day.
But what happens when we fight off a chasm? It just gets deeper and pulls us down farther. So I stopped. I stopped fighting this feeling. I stopped tarnishing you with your petty flaws and petty imperfections. I just stopped running away, ignoring and evading the exuding unmistakable charisma from you. It was futile anyway. It just hurt and was tiring, and I definitely looked stupid doing it.
I accepted the feeling again. Receive, receive, receive. I received the feelings gratefully like how a Shadowhunter receive a rune: it hurts at first, but in the end it’s
glorious.
So you can guess by now I still like you. I miss you. It’s almost three years and you’re still my Great Crush. I know that the
hopelessness of us is what makes it great, but what the hell, if it’s hopeless, then it’s hopeless. Let it be.
I don’t know if I’m in love with you already – I believe that isn’t the case yet. I’m not ready for love, especially since I haven’t seen you for months. If this is love already, then that’s scary.
I’m not asking anything from you. If ever you learn that I’m apparently crazy over you, I don’t wish for you to feel weird. I don’t want awkward turtles between us – or walls or impenetrable balloons or heavy clouds or hungry bulls or any other metaphor there is. If you don’t like me, that’s okay. If you like me back, then what the hell. Honestly, I
can’t imagine us together, reading books, casting spells like we’re in Hogwarts, worshipping a silver parachute like we’re tributes in the Hunger Games, admiring Lord Voldemort and Bellatrix Lestrange like they’re our heroes. I can’t picture us together. Maybe I don’t want us together. I just want to be friends with you.
And after that… it’ll lead us to where it should lead us, if there will be an
us. (I’m such a hypocrite, no?)
I just want you to know:
Hey.
I like you.
I miss you.
FCC.
I miss you.
G.
Hullabaloo.
Butterbeer?
Always,
Tintin
Movie Review: Breaking Dawn
I have this love-hate relationship with
The Twilight Saga. I’m not sure if I’m really
in love with it – I’ve long since realized that the books aren’t really majestic as what I thought they were when I first read them (there are more awesome books out there), but I’ve kept up with all of five movies, seen them in the cinemas with my best friend every year. So I’m dubious if I’m a Twihard or not. But anyway, I might as well write what I think about it like what I had done with the past movies. (I’m writing this while I’m sick, so pardon my filthy grammar and redundancy.)
Rants and Raves: Breaking Dawn I and II (with spoilers)
The casts. I had seen
Twilight without knowing who the casts were – no background idea about them whatsoever. Nobody looked familiar except for Kristen Stewart (the
Panic Room daughter). So you can say I didn’t really have the sufficient knowledge and rights to judge their acting skills and how they got it right/wrong with the roles. But as the movies went by, and I looked up every casts’ names and other projects, I realized that, yes, they got them
right. There were some doubts and criticisms about Stewart and Robert Pattinson’s castings, but they proved them wrong in the end. (You all know how much I love the Robsten tandem.) They grew into their characters and portrayed them well without losing their personalities outside the
Twilight world. They became comfortable and acted lightly like reading minds and producing force fields are the things they do under normal circumstances.
Kristen Stewart. (Yes, I have to allot a separate paragraph for her. That’s my way.) Truth be told, I wasn’t really such a fan of KStew in the early years of the saga. She’s beautiful, yes, but she wasn’t that
stunning in my eyes. I guess my fascination and stalking love for her started when I saw her in
The Runaways as the rock legend Joan Jett. She was fantastic in that movie and proved that she has different emotions, not just a plain, deadpan that bashers think she has. And then she plucked her eyebrows and curled her hair and wore beautiful clothes that showed her curves. I’ve loved her since, and it definitely added to my level of avidness for the movies. When she found herself in a controversy, I wasn’t even bothered for long. I didn’t care. That’s KStew, and that’s what she does, and who cares? It’s not her responsibility to keep you all glued and true to your humanity; she has her own, you have yours. And
okay, back to the saga. Umm, can I just say that she’s really my Bella Swan? I can’t imagine anyone else for that part. (Bias alert! Bias alert!)
The wedding. I don’t remember a lot about the Bella-Edward wedding scene from the book (Bella’s insecurities over Rosalie’s beauty – this I remember, though), but with the first
Breaking Dawn movie, I didn’t need to recall. I loved it: Bella’s dress, the rings, the venue, the colors, the song (“Flightless Bird, American Mouth”) and Charlie Swan, of course. And the love scene with the breaking headboard was
phenomenal.
The wolves. Were amazingly and artistically done. Thank you.
The non-Cullen vampires. I loved how they had shown that not every vampire is pale, chalk white. The diverse races of them bloodsuckers – showing different skin color, body type, language, super powers – were amazing. My favorite non-Cullen vampire would be that drunkard with all the hair and who somehow had a fling with one of the Denali vampire. (Remind me to look him up.) And of course the Volturri will always be
bad ass in my eyes.
Renesmee Carlie Cullen. I just have one question though: why were the younger and teenage Nessie faces computerized? Does she really have to look like her mother and they couldn’t find a fitting one so they resorted to the powers of technology? She’s cute, yes, but while I was watching her I couldn’t push away the thought that she was computerized. (How can someone forget that, though?)
Hot, vampire sex. (I borrowed that phrase from
The Vampire Diaries.) Not trying to be a pervert or anything, but I just really think vampire-Bella and Edward’s love scene in their cabin was
beautiful. It wasn’t the kind of scene that’s pornographic and somehow vomit-inducing and won’t give you spontaneous orgasm; it was just plain beautiful and passionate to watch. And it definitely beats the headboard-breaking, pillow-ripping, bruise-producing escapade. (Remember: Vampire beds aren’t meant for sleeping.)
The songs. After that super melancholic soundtrack from
New Moon (the only song that made it to my playlist was “Possibility”), I never bothered with appreciating the music they put in the movies. But the last installment’s got me all hooked again. The music was amazing and not monotone and “A Thousand Years [Part 2]” crawls into your heart and repeatedly stab it with its words that you just have to cry like shit. I also like “All I’ve Ever Needed” by Paul McDonald and Nikki Reed – they’re adorable. (I made a
BD II OST playlist. Enjoy.)
The last movie, concisely.(Meaning
Breaking Dawn II.) It was
fucked up – in a good way. For starters, it was funny. (I didn’t know vampire Bella was goofy.) I also like all the super imposed elements in the movie, emphasizing Bella’s newly-acquired skill for sharper senses – the drop of water, the blooming of flowers, the humming of birds, the scent of preys – brilliantly crafted. Fast forward to the battle scene, which I should say was very much a life-ruiner and a mind-fucker, thank you. Blame Alice Cullen’s premonition for my unnecessary heart breaking ann cries of shock and pain – the Cullens, the Clearwaters, the Volturri and several unnamed vampires dying was too much to bear. So that was the part I hated the most, together with the pixelated Nessie faces. The battle was technically brilliantly made, butt no more faux dying please?
To close this, even if
The Twilight Saga isn’t my favorite series of all time, it’s still part of me and my best friend’s movie history. It’s not the best there is, but it’s part of the olden times, and thank God for DVDs and soft copies, we can always re-watch it when we feel like we need some dose of nostalgia.
We’ll miss you,
Twilight. (Or more likely, we’ll miss you beautiful vampires, hot-bod wolves and Charlie Swan.)
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a woeful & chaotic diary since 071409
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