Hello, It’s Me
Dear blog/self/non-existent readers:
It has been so long since I blogged. More than six months of not-writing makes me feel weird and out-of-loop about this. I’m not even sure if I can still write. It’s sad. It’s pathetic. But I will try my best. (This is very sad. I won several writing awards back in school and spearheaded the whole 2014-2015 issue of our college paper. Writing should be second nature to me. But now I am in the dark –
literally in the dark: I am writing this in my unlit room.)
Adulthood made me like this. I’d like to think that I’ve adjusted pretty well with being a working adult and going to the office to earn money, but the truth is I haven’t. Yes, I haven’t thought of quitting yet, but being an adult took the silly, fun-loving, creative side out of me. I lost time; I lost interest in things. My brain is still overthinking like fuck, and every night I still get torrents of ideas and thoughts that are blog-worthy but I don’t do anything about them because I am a sad and tired human being. I also get distracted easily. I’m losing the fervent amour I used to feel towards writing and sharing stories and basically blabbing on the Internet. It scares me. (Don’t get me wrong: I’m grateful for the opportunity of having a job, but sometimes I just want a timeout. I guess that’s not too bad and too much to ask.) I don’t want to lose this love. So now I came up with a solution to this uncalled-for dilemma: I am going old school. I will start a journal where I can write about every spontaneous thoughts, small or big, spontaneously. My friend gifted me a journal for Christmas (actually I requested for it), and I swear to God I will write on it as much as I can. And when I come up with something interesting enough to blog, I will.
So now that we have that out of the way, I will give some updates on my life in the past year (also known as “Random Shit Thoughts”) even though nobody cares because I am that type of person:
My reading is slow, but I still read. I set thirty reads last year, and thank goodness I surpassed that goal. I would legit hate myself if I didn’t achieved that. Overall I’ve read 32 novels this year, and one little black Penguin Classics book (No. 57:
How Much Land Does a Man Need? by Leo Tolstoy). I am happy about these numbers. The best novels I’ve read last year are
Mosquitoland (David Arnold);
I’ll Give You the Sun (Jandy Nelson);
Where’d You Go, Bernadette (Maria Semple);
The Girl On the Train (Paula Hawkins);
All the Bright Places (Jennifer Niven); and
Red Queen (Victoria Aveyard).
I am so into Years & Years and the fandom basically swallowed me whole. I de-stress from work by fangirling over music. And my 2015, without a doubt, was dominated by
Years & Years. But instead of feeling a sense of calmness every time I do my job as a
Philippine Street Team member, I get very emotional. Just looking at the faces of the band members gives me feelings that make me want to cry; their interviews never fail to wreck me; and by the time I listen to their music, I am in a state of emotional coma. And I
love everything about it! I love the fandom I become Internet-friends with! I hope this year will be our year to shine and be kings and be gold and experience Years & Years live! Oh my God my feels!
I’ve listened to so many artists last 2015 and I am very proud of myself. I am so in love with the artists on my playlist that I want to shove their music into every person I meet. A friend from the Years & Years fandom said that she loves my taste in music (and books), and it was basically the best compliment I have ever received. I cannot sing without embarrassing myself nor can I play any instruments, so my scary enthusiasm for discovering great artists and great music is my self-proclaimed skill/talent. Someday I will work for a recording company where I’ll listen to music all day and pitch in artists who deserve to be produced, and then be friends with these artists. This is what I call hashtag Goals As Fuck.
I’ve gained some non-Internet friends. Working exposed me to people I normally clam up when around. I learned to start relationships and forge (wow big word) friendships. I have “families” in the office that I’ve grown very attached to it’s scary. I learned to adjust to the different personalities of my colleagues, and haven’t made enemies yet (not that I will; I am passive-aggressive – allegedly). I haven’t lost my mind or had a panic attack in public so that’s a plus. I hope in time I will learn who are worth keeping. (I’m not a squad-friends kind: I just have small number of friends that I genuinely like. I have two best friends I love very much I can’t imagine losing. What am I even talking about.)
I still have time to be alone, so I guess that’s good. I seldom go out on weekends because I always choose to stay at home and rest my fucking fragile body. Being surrounded with people every day sometimes exhausts me, so Rest Day Me Times are important. I usually just read, watch movies/series and sleep all day in bed. It is fucking
paradise.
So I guess that’s it. This 2016, I promise to rekindle romance with writing and other hobbies I left behind because of adulthood. Every day I will try to be good to myself and the people around me. And write Random Shit Thoughts on my journal that I’ve just now decided to name Finch (after the sad, dark, brilliant character from
All the Bright Places).
(If there’s one thing that hasn’t changed, it’s how lame my closing paragraphs are.)
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a woeful & chaotic diary since 071409
Hello, It’s Me
Dear blog/self/non-existent readers:
It has been so long since I blogged. More than six months of not-writing makes me feel weird and out-of-loop about this. I’m not even sure if I can still write. It’s sad. It’s pathetic. But I will try my best. (This is very sad. I won several writing awards back in school and spearheaded the whole 2014-2015 issue of our college paper. Writing should be second nature to me. But now I am in the dark –
literally in the dark: I am writing this in my unlit room.)
Adulthood made me like this. I’d like to think that I’ve adjusted pretty well with being a working adult and going to the office to earn money, but the truth is I haven’t. Yes, I haven’t thought of quitting yet, but being an adult took the silly, fun-loving, creative side out of me. I lost time; I lost interest in things. My brain is still overthinking like fuck, and every night I still get torrents of ideas and thoughts that are blog-worthy but I don’t do anything about them because I am a sad and tired human being. I also get distracted easily. I’m losing the fervent amour I used to feel towards writing and sharing stories and basically blabbing on the Internet. It scares me. (Don’t get me wrong: I’m grateful for the opportunity of having a job, but sometimes I just want a timeout. I guess that’s not too bad and too much to ask.) I don’t want to lose this love. So now I came up with a solution to this uncalled-for dilemma: I am going old school. I will start a journal where I can write about every spontaneous thoughts, small or big, spontaneously. My friend gifted me a journal for Christmas (actually I requested for it), and I swear to God I will write on it as much as I can. And when I come up with something interesting enough to blog, I will.
So now that we have that out of the way, I will give some updates on my life in the past year (also known as “Random Shit Thoughts”) even though nobody cares because I am that type of person:
My reading is slow, but I still read. I set thirty reads last year, and thank goodness I surpassed that goal. I would legit hate myself if I didn’t achieved that. Overall I’ve read 32 novels this year, and one little black Penguin Classics book (No. 57:
How Much Land Does a Man Need? by Leo Tolstoy). I am happy about these numbers. The best novels I’ve read last year are
Mosquitoland (David Arnold);
I’ll Give You the Sun (Jandy Nelson);
Where’d You Go, Bernadette (Maria Semple);
The Girl On the Train (Paula Hawkins);
All the Bright Places (Jennifer Niven); and
Red Queen (Victoria Aveyard).
I am so into Years & Years and the fandom basically swallowed me whole. I de-stress from work by fangirling over music. And my 2015, without a doubt, was dominated by
Years & Years. But instead of feeling a sense of calmness every time I do my job as a
Philippine Street Team member, I get very emotional. Just looking at the faces of the band members gives me feelings that make me want to cry; their interviews never fail to wreck me; and by the time I listen to their music, I am in a state of emotional coma. And I
love everything about it! I love the fandom I become Internet-friends with! I hope this year will be our year to shine and be kings and be gold and experience Years & Years live! Oh my God my feels!
I’ve listened to so many artists last 2015 and I am very proud of myself. I am so in love with the artists on my playlist that I want to shove their music into every person I meet. A friend from the Years & Years fandom said that she loves my taste in music (and books), and it was basically the best compliment I have ever received. I cannot sing without embarrassing myself nor can I play any instruments, so my scary enthusiasm for discovering great artists and great music is my self-proclaimed skill/talent. Someday I will work for a recording company where I’ll listen to music all day and pitch in artists who deserve to be produced, and then be friends with these artists. This is what I call hashtag Goals As Fuck.
I’ve gained some non-Internet friends. Working exposed me to people I normally clam up when around. I learned to start relationships and forge (wow big word) friendships. I have “families” in the office that I’ve grown very attached to it’s scary. I learned to adjust to the different personalities of my colleagues, and haven’t made enemies yet (not that I will; I am passive-aggressive – allegedly). I haven’t lost my mind or had a panic attack in public so that’s a plus. I hope in time I will learn who are worth keeping. (I’m not a squad-friends kind: I just have small number of friends that I genuinely like. I have two best friends I love very much I can’t imagine losing. What am I even talking about.)
I still have time to be alone, so I guess that’s good. I seldom go out on weekends because I always choose to stay at home and rest my fucking fragile body. Being surrounded with people every day sometimes exhausts me, so Rest Day Me Times are important. I usually just read, watch movies/series and sleep all day in bed. It is fucking
paradise.
So I guess that’s it. This 2016, I promise to rekindle romance with writing and other hobbies I left behind because of adulthood. Every day I will try to be good to myself and the people around me. And write Random Shit Thoughts on my journal that I’ve just now decided to name Finch (after the sad, dark, brilliant character from
All the Bright Places).
(If there’s one thing that hasn’t changed, it’s how lame my closing paragraphs are.)
← older / top / newer →
a woeful & chaotic diary since 071409
Profile
Already several months had passed, and I am missing
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry more and more each fleeting day. There are just some things in life that we can never forget – especially that something that had given us knowledge, skills, strong relationships and a second home. I am glad that everything in the magical world is now at peace, since Voldemort (yes, I can now say his name; no need to be afraid) had died. I had secretly admired Tom Marvolo Riddle (Voldemort’s birth name) though, because of his intelligence, passion and love for magic. Wasn’t he very clever to think of and conjure his seven
Horcruxes to preserve his life, or form a clan of
Death Eaters who were very loyal to him and would give up their lives just for him to succeed? Not everybody can acquire that much loyalty from people these days. I do not, however, admire him for the way he had carried out all of his plans. He had a good agenda, his means just weren’t morally right. But he still is one of the darkest wizards of all time… and let’s leave it that way.
Oh, for all those who are baffled of what I’m saying here and who the heck I am, my name is
Christine Faye Ordas, and I am an alumnus of Hogwarts. I came from the bronze-and-blue-clad house of the smart ass witch Rowena Ravenclaw and her dictum
“Wit beyond measure is a man’s greatest treasure.” And yes, I know the wonderful Luna Lovegood (she’s such a darling) and Harry Potter’s first crush Cho Chang. I had just left Hogwarts last May. Right now I am trying to pursue a career in magical researches, literature and writing. It’s my dream to inscribe intellectual books, publish and sell them in
Flourish and Blotts for the future Hogwarts students’ use. I am also planning to credibly write for the
Daily Prophet, the magical world’s primary news bulletin. And of course, I will be very much honored to contribute to Mr. Xenophilius Lovegood’s
Quibbler (hence, my interest in magical researches). I have always found the Lovegoods a fascinating family, and I bet working with and for them will be very exciting. Or maybe, in Merlin’s beard’s time, I can write legends and bedtime stories like the famous – and wickedly brilliant – Beedle the Bard.
And that’s how my life goes these days. I am utterly missing my old school, my friends, the Great Hall, the bronze eagle knocker just outside the Ravenclaw common room, Professor Flitwick (the head of our house), Hogsmeade, the Quidditch matches (although I didn’t actually play for the house), the moving portraits, the castle ghosts, the pumpkins on Halloween, the giant pine trees on Christmas, Rubeus Hagrid’s (Hogwarts’ gamekeeper) tea and treacle fudge – even the crabby Argus Filch (Hogwarts’ caretaker) I miss. Maybe I can visit the school grounds sometimes and see how the magical world’s been doing since Voldemort died (I’ve been spending my months in the muggle world, you see). I’ve heard everybody’s been moving on and starting all over again; the ministry is back on work under Kingsley Shacklebolt; and Harry Potter’s scar haven’t been disturbing him since.
All is well, indeed.
And because of that, we should celebrate and drink firewhisky! Oh, I still don’t drink firewhisky; I can take butterbeer or tea or pumpkin juice – just not firewhisky, please.
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